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Can You Hear Me Now?


When did dining out get so loud? I understand a crowded bar can get noisy, but we had one of the worst noisy restaurant experiences ever during our recent stay at Sandals Dunn’s River. I wasn’t expecting that from a resort that markets itself as a romantic getaway for couples. It was a minor disappointment in an otherwise wonderful week, but since noisy dining seems to be the norm these days, I thought I would share how we handled it.


The most popular dining venue at Sandals resorts is usually the French restaurant, or the steakhouse. Not at Sandals Dunn’s River. The Italian restaurant was where everyone wanted to dine. Walk into any Italian restaurant anywhere in the world and you are greeted by the pleasant aroma of garlic, oregano and Parmesan cheese. At Sandals Dunn’s River we were assaulted by a wall of noise. It was the loudest venue at that resort, except perhaps the pool with a swim-up bar.


The restaurant was particularly loud the night we chose to dine there, the source of the noise being a group of four ladies seated in the middle of the restaurant. From what little we could make out of their conversation they weren’t couples staying at the resort for a romantic retreat enjoying a ladies night out...they were part of a group attending a destination wedding. That was the first problem. Groups are loud, even when they split off into smaller groups as these four ladies did, and group behavior at an all-inclusive resort tends to carry over to everything individual group members do. Another problem was the empty bottles (yes, plural) of wine at their table. But mostly it was because they were talking over one another, each louder than the others in an effort to be heard.


We weren’t seated long before realizing the noise was too much…so we decided to leave. Can I just say we don’t walks out of restaurants. We tolerate a lot, but this noise was too much. We told the hostess why we were leaving…we wanted her to understand it had nothing to do with our server. It was the noise, but she didn’t need to be told that…she knew. Every other diner was experiencing the same frustration, yet she made no effort to address it. Instead she followed us out into the courtyard and practically begged us to come back another night, assuring us it would be quieter. Not much of a promise since it couldn’t get much louder, but we did return the next night. Though still loud, the place is an acoustic nightmare, it was tolerable enough to stay through dinner. The food was good, but I'm glad we didn't stay the previous night...it wasn't good enough to have endured that noise.


Our experience, though extreme, is not unique. I recently read an article in The Washington Post about noisy restaurants, a collaboration between the Post’s food critic, an acoustics professor, and an audio producer. The food critic noted that excessive noise levels are the most common complaint in consumer restaurant reviews, representing about 70% of all negative comments.


The article included several audio files from actual restaurants with noise levels measured in decibels (dB). A restaurant with a normal conversational volume averaged 60 dB, while a restaurant with loud conversations averaged 80 dB with louder peaks. Decibels are expressed in a logarithmic scale, meaning a noisy restaurant at 80 dB is 100 times louder than a restaurant with a conversational volume of 60 dB.


The article outlined several reasons restaurants have become so noisy. First, when people dine, they drink. After just one drink, your brain’s ability to hear yourself talk is degraded, so you talk louder without realizing it. The more you drink, the louder you talk, which the article explains is why the noise level in a crowded bar can reach 100 dB. I would say that was close to the noise level from the loud table that night at the Italian restaurant. That’s louder than a subway train, and there is nothing romantic about that.


Another reason restaurants are noisy is poor acoustic design, a fault afflicting the Italian place at Dunn’s River. Which explains why it was still loud when we went back the next night. Restaurant architects prioritize visual aesthetics over acoustic design, neglecting to include features that absorb sound. The enclosed space in a restaurant isn’t an echo chamber. The angular edges of tables, chairs and serving stations fragment sound waves, distorting and amplifying them. You don’t hear conversations, you hear noise.


What can you do when you find yourself in a similar situation? You can leave, as we did, but that isn’t always a reasonable option. If outdoor dining is offered you can ask to be seated outside, weather permitting. Without walls to recycle and amplify sound fragments, outdoor dining is acoustically pleasing rather than irritating. Most restaurants at all-inclusive resorts offer outdoor dining and we prefer it. Unfortunately, the Italian restaurant at Sandals Dunn’s River uses its outdoor space as a waiting area for drop-in diners hoping for no-shows. Not the best use of that space.


When outdoor dining isn’t an option, you can attempt to quiet the noisemakers by politely telling them they are talking so loudly you can’t hold a conversation at your table. I don’t recommend that…in my experience, it only makes things worse. Noisy diners suffer from a lack of self-awareness, usually fueled by excessive alcohol consumption, and calling their attention to it only ticks them off. The noise level may die down briefly, but it will pick up again. And when it does, you’ll find yourself the target of their even louder conversation.


If you are in a restaurant where a few loud diners are making it impossible for anyone else to carry on a conversation, let the staff know. If they do nothing you can either tolerate it or leave. Either way, call the restaurant the next day, ask to speak to the manager or owner, and let them know what you experienced. At a restaurant on your home turf, you might get comped dinner on another night. At a resort where meals are included, you’ll likely get an invitation to return with the promise of a better dining experience.


After we got home from Sandals Dunn’s River Janet sent an e-mail to the resort’s management team describing our experience. She included the many positive aspects about the resort that we enjoyed. Mainly she wanted to let them know that as travel advisors, we consider things such as noisy restaurants when recommending a resort to clients looking for a quiet, romantic getaway.


The resort’s assistant director, the second highest ranking person at the place, called Janet about our experience. She appreciated the positive feedback Janet provided about our stay, but the main reason for her call was to discuss the loud dining incident. She acknowledged that her staff’s failure to address the situation was unacceptable, and advised Janet she would be using our experience as a teaching scenario to train her restaurant staff on how to deal with loud and obnoxious diners.


The call was a welcome gesture. It didn’t give us back the romantic evening we wanted, but it let us know the resort’s management cares about the guest experience. And it gives me hope the staff will improve and provide a better environment for future guests. I have to say that other than that one lost dinner we had a great time. I wouldn’t hesitate to recommend Sandals Dunn’s River to clients looking for a romantic getaway, though I probably won’t recommend the Italian restaurant. Even without the loud table that venue is about 20 dB too loud for a romantic dinner.


And that’s all I have to say about that.

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